I did it for so long, early on. When it was just me home for the first time and a tiny girl who slept for so many hours and my hubby worked three jobs and went to school, I did it. I took pictures and I edited them and I loaded them and I organized them and I blogged them. I made beautiful, hardbound memory books. I kept the house fairly clean and I cooked kinda often and I went shopping and I took naps and I probably told you it was "soooo hard."
And it was hard, because being a first time mom is hard. It's really hard to reorient your entire brain to thinking about someone else's needs first and foremost above your own. It was hard because I was lonely and missed my husband. It was hard because I had a tremendous amount of post-partum anxiety and a pretty fair amount of stress over money.
This time around is not so hard in so many ways. He's home so much more. I don't have post-partum anxiety. Actually, I kind of think that maybe I had finally had so much anxiety that something short-circuited in my brain and rendered me incapable of feeling any anxiety at all. I kind of kid, I think.
But it's also kind of hard to have two kids and a few major life changes occurring all at once. I am not organized. I am tired. My photos are untaken and unedited and unblogged and I don't know how so many moms make all this look so easy and graceful!
Last night I was picking up toys for the 8 billionth time and feeling whiney and tired about it when I saw this sweet gem. It struck me what a mix my life is of mundane and magical.
It's so precious to me to find her little loved doll babies.
Mundane and magical. Sweet and funny. Crazy busy and a two-hour nap. That's my life right now and it's good, so good.
|She asked to nap behind the chair in Peanut's room. |
Yes. Yes, because why no?
|Both my babies asleep near each other at at bedtime at the same reasonable time.|
Only happened once.
|Tea parties. We have so many tea parties.|
The apples were her choice.
|That funny little half-smile.|
It slays me.
|He was smile-laughing in his sleep whenever he heard my voice.|
|Sleeping like his sister.|
|He rolls over and gets stuck and yells. Every time.|
|Found his fingers on his 3-month birthday.|